Being Your Husband’s Helpmeet (w/a prayer*)

One of the hardest things I’ve had to learn is how to be my husband’s help meet and how to refrain from acting as the Holy Spirit. It has taken the help of the Lord to embrace being a submissive and Spirit-responsive wife.  It is a daily challenge and decision to avoid saying things and acting in certain ways, but out of love for God and obedience to Him, I have curbed those old ways of viewing my husband and communicating with him. One of the biggest problems in marriage is when a wife–whether it’s on purpose or not–begins to behave as if she is the Holy Spirit in her husband’s life. As his help meet, she is purposed to complement him, not convict him. She is called to be his helper, but there is only one Helper and He is God’s Holy Spirit. When a wife takes the position of trying to change her husband or mold him to be who she thinks he should be, she is out of line. And in doing so, her motives are flesh-driven–motivated by selfishness–rather than by the Spirit. Therefore, she will reap no fruit from her efforts. God does not need our help to work in our husbands’ hearts. Instead of a critical, convicting voice, a wife needs to rely on God to make the necessary changes in her husband’s heart. If you find that you are in this position, there is grace for you. Ask God for forgiveness and for help to learn how to submit to your husband and love him for who he is. I understand it is difficult to stand by and know that your husband could be better and do better, but leave the molding up to God. God doesn’t need any assistant potters 🙂
Lord, help me to be the wife you have called me to be. Keep me focused on the changes I need to make within myself.  Remind me not to get in the way of Your Holy Spirit by trying to change my dear husband. It is not my job. Instead, show me what I need to do to be the best companion and partner he needs and may my life of obedience to You be a testimony that encourages and motivates him. Lord, remove from me the need to correct my husband and point out his shortcomings. Help me learn to trust You more and understand that You have a plan for my husband and You are working it out in Your perfect timing. Thank You Lord for being our Potter and perfecting us by Your Holy Spirit. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Enjoy this icebreaker photo that will help you initiate non critical conversations with your husband ♥
Have a Blessed day!
~Cassandra》All rights reserved.

“Perfectly Positioned”

Wives, you are perfectly positioned as your husband’s help meet to not only be his trusted companion at his side but also perfectly positioned to see his flaws and vulnerabilities.  Therefore, you are perfectly positioned to pray and intercede on his behalf.  The Bible says that two are better than one because if one falls down alone, he will have no one to help him up!
“Two are better than one,
Because they have a good reward for their labor.
10 For if they fall, one will lift up his companion.
But woe to him who is alone when he falls,
For he has no one to help him up.
11 Again, if two lie down together, they will keep warm;
But how can one be warm alone?
12 Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him.
And a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”  ~Ecclesiastes 4:9-12~
As a wife, I am perfectly positioned by God to be my husband’s companion and can help him up when he falls or trips over trials and sins that cause him to stumble by lifting him up in prayer! We are perfectly positioned partners who are purposed to PRAY not stand by and point out their flaws in defeat. No! We are called to be wives who are spiritual warriors–who see our husband’s blind spots with spiritual eyes. We are to lift them up continually in prayer because they are designated as the heads; therefore, that places our husbands under a systematic, covert attack from the enemy!
Husbands are called to provide and lead their wives and children. They face many pressures and temptations! We cannot wait until trials arise to pray for them! We have to pray for them as a part of routine, preventive prayer so that problems that may not be so obvious can be addressed spiritually–taken before our Father–before they become full-blown sin traps and strongholds. The Bible verse that comes to mind when I think about my husband’s prayer needs is  1 Peter 3:1: “In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives,”. It reminds me that more can be done on his behalf by prayer rather than talking with him about certain issues. Certain issues that, if you know, have repeatedly been a persistent weakness in your husband’s battle against sin, are a part of a larger war that is not his battle or yours. But the Lord’s battle! And you will be wiser for the wear by praying for him; otherwise, you may come to the realization that you have been like a broken record–saying the same things over and over and over and over again–with no improvements or permanent changes in your husband’s heart.
I like to think that in those cases, a wife’s words are an interference that may hinder the spiritual work God is doing. The husband may rebel more because of her words, and God is not going to compete. Some battles are His, and we are wise to pray for discernment about what we are to say, when we are to discuss, or if we should talk about our husband’s issues at all. Prayer=Power and offers more leverage than our words. Think before you speak–pray first! Be bold about praying on your husband’s behalf because no one other than Jesus is more qualified to intercede for him. I guarantee that you will see more blessings and breakthroughs by praying for your husband, and his heart will trust you! You are perfectly positioned! God bless 🙂
Cassandra Salamone♥