I am writing this letter from my own experiences and also from what other wives have shared with me these years through my ministry. I am writing as if from a husband’s perspective–a fellow combatant in the spiritual war against marriage.
Do you remember when we fought side by side on the battlefield? Do you remember how every strategy we employed and every tactic we used in agreement was powerfully effective against the enemy. The fiery darts would assail us unexpectedly at times, but we had each other’s backs always. We looked out for each other’s interests and covered each other with prayer and wielded our shields of faith to fortify and strengthen our defenses. We moved and we lived as a unit. One-flesh. Do you remember how the enemy began to craftily turn up the heat of temptations during a moment when we were disjointed in our communications. Remember that battle when we battled each other as we pushed back the devil from gaining a foothold in our messy territory. That territory we tried to secure using our own power instead of relying upon and trusting God! It was crucial and much ground was lost! Words were spoken that betrayed our love for each other. Actions were taken that disregarded my authority and there was no order in our marriage. No chain of command as neither of us submitted to the will of God. Respect was lost and the distractions engulfed me and as you ran to fetch the water of God’s Word, for a moment I was tempted to loosen my breastplate. As I experienced relief, I felt pain pierce through my heart and saw myself impaled upon the enemy’s javelin. I was drowning in myself, my flesh….the enemy had me, but he had to flee. The power of the Holy Spirit was upon you as you poured God’s Word over me. You spoke and streams of water flowed from your belly as you cut the enemy’s plantings back with your sword. The damage was done. The enemy had gained access in my moment of weakness. Can you ever forgive me truly? It’s only because of Jesus that I was able to regain my footing and be healed. The enemy’s thrust of the javelin of adultery nearly destroyed me. I realize it nearly destroyed you too. It changed you. Made you unable to see me. Can you see my heart? Do you choose to see me through eyes of pain locked upon the past or see me with fresh eyes of mercy? When will you clean off the war paint and stop fighting me so that we can get back to fighting for our kingdom again–against the enemy who wants our marriage destroyed?! Fight with me as my warrior wife. Fight for me as my prayer warrior. Fight against our true enemy–the devil–who sets himself against us for life.
The enemy is so wily that he has tricked you with an illusion that I am the pain I caused you to feel. When will you stop holding on to the leviathan of pain and resentment inside? See me and let the scales fall from your eyes. I am not your true enemy. I am praying for you to forgive me and give me another chance to earn back your trust and reclaim my position as the head so I may properly protect and cover you with prayer. See my heart. See me as a man who failed you, who utterly failed God. See me like Jesus does and as much as I need Him interceding for me at all times at the right hand of Father God, I need you to pray for me no matter what you see. Don’t believe that the pain you feel is who I am or our future. Don’t let the enemy’s advances into our marriage cause you to give up on us! Pray for me and war for me. Don’t leave me as for dead as a lost cause. Jesus can still do a work in my heart. Pray for my salvation. The devil is in it for keeps.
Can you see me beyond the smoke of the confusion, the heartache I’ve caused you, and your disappointments? Will you recognize that it was the enemy’s plan all along to decapitate the heads–husbands–and impale them for all to see?
“For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body.24 Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.“–Ephesians 5:23-24, NKJV.
Stuck upon javelins of adultery caught in their sins! The enemy wants husbands incapacitated and in bondage to their flesh so that we can’t operate as the heads andthe world watches us flounder. Watches God’s marriages come to a demise. BUT GOD. His arm is not too short to save us.
“Behold, the Lord’s hand is not shortened,
That it cannot save;
Nor His ear heavy,
That it cannot hear.” –Isaiah 59:1, NKJV
STEP BACK AND WATCH GOD FIGHT FOR YOU, FOR ME, FOR OUR FAMILY, OUR MARRIAGE!!!! Jesus can do what you cannot! Nothing is too hard or impossible for Him!!!
“Then the Lord saw it, and it displeased Him
That there was no justice.
16 He saw that there was no man,
And wondered that there was no intercessor;
Therefore His own arm brought salvation for Him;
And His own righteousness, it sustained Him.
17 For He put on righteousness as a breastplate,
And a helmet of salvation on His head;
He put on the garments of vengeance for clothing,
And was clad with zeal as a cloak.
18 According to their deeds, accordingly He will repay,
Fury to His adversaries,
Recompense to His enemies;
The coastlands He will fully repay.
19 So shall they fear
The name of the Lord from the west,
And His glory from the rising of the sun;
When the enemy comes in like a flood,
The Spirit of the Lord will lift up a standard against him.
20 “The Redeemer will come to Zion,
And to those who turn from transgression in Jacob,”
Says the Lord.” –Isaiah 59:15-20, NKJV.
So hold on!!! Be my warrior wife and fight for me. But don’t fight against me. And I ask you my love, to remember me. See me again by faith. See who I am in Christ and speak that over my life!
the Husbands Who have fallen
Cassandra (hope this blesses you!)
“Stand therefore, having girded your waist with truth, having put on the breastplate of righteousness, 15 and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace; 16 above all, taking the shield of faith with which you will be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one. 17 And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God; 18 praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being watchful to this end with all perseverance and supplication for all the saints— 19 and for me, that utterance may be given to me, that I may open my mouth boldly to make known the mystery of the gospel.” –Ephesians 6:14-19, NKJV.
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