This post is Day 9 in the 1/2 CMBA Marathon Blogging Challenge to post 13 days in October
Yesterday, my post rallied for Breast Cancer Awareness–for husbands’ support in helping their wives to be proactive in preventative health measures. October is a month that serves as a platform to speak out against domestic violence. Today’s post renders a TKO (Total KnockOut) blow against abuse in all it’s forms. Love does not hurt, bruise, break, crush, frighten, threaten, intimidate, control, or take another’s life.
God clearly provides the best and most comprehensive definition of what love truly is, as He is love and the most qualified to speak on it.
*1 Corinthians 13:4-8 AMP~ “4 Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy, is not boastful orvainglorious, does not display itself haughtily.5 It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God’s love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful orresentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong].
6 It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness, but rejoices when right and truth prevail.7 Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening].8 Love never fails [never fades out or becomes obsolete or comes to an end]. As for prophecy (the gift of interpreting the divine will and purpose), it will be fulfilled and pass away; as for tongues, they will be destroyed and cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away [it will lose its value and be superseded by truth].”
If you are a victim of domestic violence, I encourage you to seek help. Contact the police immediately if you are in danger of being physically harmed! Many victims will not contact the authorities because they fear losing their sense of financial security from the perpetrating spouse. In addition, let a trusted member of your church know that you are being abused and arrange for your pastor/church elder to meet with your spouse. The important thing is to call attention to the matter, address it with the proper authorities, and stop the abuse from occuring in the future. If you’re not facing physical danger but being verbally abused, there are ways one can Biblically respond.
*Proverbs 26:4-5 NIV “4 Do not answer a fool according to his folly
or you yourself will be just like him. 5 Answer a fool according to his folly, or he will be wise in his own eyes.”
Once a verbal assault begins, it is best to refrain from arguing back. Announce that the discussion can resume when things calm down.
*Proverbs 15:1 NIV “A gentle answer turns away wrath but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
On the other hand, If you are a perpetrator of abuse to your spouse and struggle with anger issues, you need to diligently seek help as well! Contact a local police department and inquire about anger management counseling.
Let’s take a look at what God’s Word says about anger.
“BE ANGRY, AND yet DO NOT SIN ; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not give the devil an opportunity. He who steals must steal no longer ; but rather he must labor, performing with his own hands what is good, so that he will have something to share with one who has need. Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear. Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.”
“A fool always loses his temper, But a wise man holds it back.”
“This you know, my beloved brethren. But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger ; for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God.”
“Do not be eager in your heart to be angry, For anger resides in the bosom of fools.”
“But now you also, put them all aside : anger, wrath, malice, slander, and abusive speech from your mouth.”
“What is the source of quarrels and conflicts among you? Is not the source your pleasures that wage war in your members? You lust and do not have ; so you commit murder. You are envious and cannot obtain ; so you fight and quarrel. You do not have because you do not ask.”
“He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, And he who rules his spirit, than he who captures a city.”
“Do not associate with a man given to anger ; Or go with a hot-tempered man,”
“Cease from anger and forsake wrath ; Do not fret ; it leads only to evildoing. For evildoers will be cut off, But those who wait for the LORD, they will inherit the land.”
We can see from the Scriptures, that displays of anger and outbursts of rage, which can include: striking a spouse with one’s hands or objects; kicking, shoving, spitting, grabbing/squeezing in order to inflict pain; rape; choking; or any manner of harsh, abusive speech are all unacceptable and frowned upon by the Lord. If you are a victim of domestic violence, please understand that it is not your fault. No one deserves to be beaten or verbally assaulted. God is love and abuse is not love!!!
If you are a victim of domestic violence or uncertain as to whether you are, please visit this link:
National Domestic Violence Hotline
Or call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1−800−799−SAFE(7233) orTTY 1−800−787−3224.
May God bless your homes with love, joy, and peace!