“Private Lessons”


Sex between a husband and his wife is a sacred song—a holy and righteous opus written by God. The chords of sexual intimacy are to be played within the confines of marriage. God wants us to enjoy our spouse! Our bodies are instruments on loan from God to be exclusively handled and played by our spouse with great ardor!

Repeat the previous sentence aloud to yourself or to your spouse and meditate upon the key word “ardor”. Merriam-Webster’s online dictionary provides the origin for “ardor” as being: “Middle English ardour, from Anglo-French & Latin; Anglo-French, from Latin ardor burning, heat..” In addition, the following words are Merriam-Webster’s synonyms for “ardor”: “ardency, emotion, enthusiasm, fervency, fervidness, fervor, fire, heat, intenseness, intensity, passion, passionateness, vehemence, warmth, white heat.” Consider your level of focus as you study and play your instrument with ardor πŸ™‚

We are to be our spouse’s instructor and exercise patience and loving kindness. We must generously schedule time for private instructions in order to demonstrate and practice proper hand positioning and theory (rhythm, harmony, form, and allocation of voices). As the rehearsals increase in frequency, the performance becomes more fluid, elegant, and perfected. All Glory to Adonai, our Master Composer, especially when the opus resonates in perfect pitch!
Bravo! Bravo!

Martha Peace, in her book “The Excellent Wife”, shares, “Some wives believe that their husbands know everything about sex, and they (the wives) shouldn’t have to tell them anything. That’s not true. Only the wife can know for herself what is pleasurable for her. She should lovingly take his hand and guide him to the parts of her body she would like him to caress…Doctor Wayne Mack gives this illustration,’My wife has been scratching my back for years, and she has yet to hit the right spot the first time!’ ”

~ Cassandra Salamone

13 thoughts on ““Private Lessons”

  1. Lisa Headley says:

    I love this! It makes me cry… with a little bit of a smile. Thank you for writing this. A number of years ago, God showed me He wanted me to play my husband like a guitar…! [Your picture looks a lot like what I saw except I was the one playing the strings and my husband was the guitar.] Since then, we’ve continued to work through many issues, but we’ve not seen a complete breakthrough… There’s a lot of pain in my heart concerning my marriage, but I’m committed to stay and love my husband as he is with me. We just celebrated 25 years of marriage, and I’m so thankful. xoxoxo


  2. Cassandra's Marriage Mints says:

    Congrats on your 25 years together! By the grace of God, you two can continue to allow Him to complete His work in you. I pray that He will show you what cords you need to release (too much tautness from pain and harbored resentments will make it hard to relax and let the love play fluidly between you and our husband). I pray you are completely delivered in this area and experience victory in your marriage bed as God purposed. In Jesus’ name, Amen! All glory to God:)


  3. Jennifer says:

    BB! I read this in a counseling session today and we were both crying… This moves me in different ways every time I read it. It is honestly, the greatest thing I have ever read regarding sex and marriage.


  4. Cassandra says:

    Reblogged this on Cassandra's Marriage Mints and commented:

    This is one of my most popular articles, and it’s touching on a topic that is essential in marriage–Sex! Sex was designed by God to be enjoyed between a husband and his wife. Our bodies are designed to respond to and desire intimacy. It should not be neglected in a marriage. Pray that God will increase the bond and oneness between you and your spouse~ Cassandraβ™‘


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